The other day I was looking at my living room, overwhelmed was an understatement. I had already helped my son clean it 3 times before lunch and another toddler tornado hit. Blocks had been dumped and buckets filled over and over. Cars were lined up and blankets thrown around.
But instead of getting upset, or making him clean…again; I grabbed my book, my (second) coffee and sat down and watched my son enjoy his mess.
Kids learn through play, this was his work. And watching him enjoy himself was the best feeling. Seeing him play with toys I thought he had forgotten about. I try so hard to keep electronics out of his hands as much as possible. So seeing toys everywhere just meant he was using his imagination.
Something alot of kids today lack. So many people get caught up in the convenience of technology, and its powerful distraction for behavior. Trust me I get it, I’m not above using tablets or phones etc. But I try really hard to use them as little as possible.
Days like today I’m thankful for his imagination, lining up his army guys and setting up his train set. His mess was simply his work of the day, his mark left behind. The more toys out the deeper he dug into creativity. Even better, the harder he plays , the harder he naps!
But most importantly, how blessed is my son to have so many toys to play with. So many different ways to learn, and figure out life. Not everyone is as fortunate and blessed to have those options. Even in such a mess there is always, always something to be thankful for.
Yesterday was such a busy day, we had so many errands to run. Well, to be honest, my only obligation was grocery shopping. But… I like to maximize my small budget, so I go to a few different stores to get the best deals. Although doing that feels so tedious and time consuming, (especially when you have a toddler to get in and out of the car seat at each stop, in a New England winter to boot) it is worth it at the end. Yesterday I ended up saving myself almost $40 between sales and coupons!
Anyways, I went out early to do my shopping, early on a Wednesday morning…perfect! I ended up leaving my house at 8am and didn’t finish shopping till 10:15 yikes, how does time pass so quickly?
Oh well, the hardest part for me is putting it all away anyways. I mean where does one find room in the fridge for all of this, it seemed so empty when I left! Strapping my son in his seat for the last time (of what felt like a hundred) I said, “Okay Bub, let’s go get some library time in before lunch!”
No matter how busy I get, it is so important to get my son in social settings. Being a stay at home mom, one of my biggest fears was how he would end up interacting socially since he was home with me ALL day, EVERY day.. Which he actually has had zero issues with at all. But because I pushed so hard for that.
I get social anxiety, so often. It prevents me from doing things that I want to do, love to do, even promised someone I would do. I have let it defeat me, and take over my day. Which sometimes is okay. But what isn’t okay, is allowing it to affect my son, or stopping me from taking him out of the house to do things. So even on a busy day, where I feel like I have no time to even breath, or a day where I wake up feeling like my anxiety has its hands around my neck, holding me hostage; I power through it so it doesn’t affect his day, or him. Take him to the park, the library, out to the zoo, even getting out of the house in the winter to play in the back yard for a half hour. Anything! No matter how small, it affects our children, it helps mold and shape them into a better person.
So many times I have been anxious and thought to myself, “I can’t go in the library, and possibly have to talk to other people..” The thought is stomach wrenching. But I am so glad I stood my ground, because the second he looks up at me, playing with the train set or the play kitchen and smiles, that huge big smile..it instantly calms my nerves. They say children save you, and they couldn’t be any more correct.
My son makes me into a better person everyday and he doesn’t even know it.
Sometimes all a mom needs is her morning coffee and a beautiful view of the sunrise.
My favorite part of the day is having my morning coffee, because let’s face it every mom has that “crutch” to get them through the day. Coffee, tea, exercise whatever it is. Some days I drink my coffee so fast I don’t even get to enjoy it and then others I have to re-heat it 3 or 4 times. (I guess life is all about balance.)
Most days, I use my morning coffee to prep myself for the day ahead. Taking time to truly reflect and enjoy. Be grateful for what I have, not so rushed with life that the smallest thing ruins my day. I mean, how lucky am I to be able to stay home and watch my son grow and learn new things everyday?
Moms, we can’t pour from an empty cup. We get so wrapped up in trying to be the best mother, wife, friend daughter etc. Don’t burn yourself out so that you miss the beauty in everyday. Take time everyday for yourself, you and everyone you love deserves the best version of you. Today is a new day, a new mindset. And I can do this.
As I sit here, trying to find the right words for my first blog so much comes to mind I almost don’t know where to begin. Just like being a parent, I’m overfilled with the feeling nothing I say will be good enough. But as I sit here and think, all those times I’ve ever doubted myself, thinking what I was doing or saying wouldn’t be the right thing or the best thing; I shouldn’t have. I sell myself short far too often. As a first time parent it’s so easy to do. But I once read a quote along the lines, “When I went to pick up my kid from school [he] was looking around the room and instanly smiled when [he] finally saw me. Because [he] wasn’t looking for the perfect parent, [he] was looking for [HIS] parent.” How very true. Our children don’t expect perfection, they just expect us to love them unconditionally through the good the bad and the ugly. We’re allowed to have bad days too! We’re allowed to struggle and doubt ourselves, stumble on what words to say or not to say, even question ourselves entirely. Through pain and struggle comes growth. And we simply cannot appreciate the good without the bad. That being said, it wont be like this for long! Pretty soon writing these will come easier and it will be another chapter of my story I tell my son..stepping outside of your comfort zone and hoping it becomes worth it.